Uber October is yet to start. I´m in a parallel universe right now, watching myself as from above. I am yet to participate in my own life. I don´t think I am unravelling or anything - but I really should start participating before it gets really hard.

5 kilos. 5 kilos in a week. That´s a month´s worth of hard work. I am telling myself that I will not let the numbers get to me, mainly because I don´t have a choice. The choice being if I "give up" and "give in" I will be 160 kilos in a year, and frankly that is just not an option. So I don´t have a choice. The 5 kilos are not going to bother me or get me down, I will just start participating in my life and they will go away. Again.

I said to Dave that I could only explain all the eating so that I´d been lonely. I had just spent a weekend with my friends and then I came home and I got lonely. "So you turned to your oldest friend then?" he said. And it all came clear. Of course I did. I turned to bread and chocolate. My constant friends. My best friends.

Well, I am going to make new friends. Broccoli. And maybe my hipbones. And I might chat up those jodhpurs I saw in Zara today.

Uber October is for new friends.